Family separation can be a stressful experience for children and young people. However, research suggests that it is not the actual separation that impacts children and young people negatively but rather exposure to parental conflict. You may be interested to read recent research on the impact of parenting via the Family Solutions Group. You can read their report here.
Child-centred arrangements, effective communication and ongoing, respectful co-parenting, are all hugely beneficial to children. There are various ways to deal with parenting post-separation:-
Informal Agreement
Parents can work together to create an informal agreement, sometimes called a parenting plan. An example/template can be found using this link, Cafcass Parenting Plan.
Mediation
A mediator can assist parents to discuss arrangements, co-parenting principles or parenting plans or to provide a space to discuss concerns or worries. Children and young people can be involved in the mediation process when they are of appropriate age (usually ten or above) – see our Mediation section for more information.
Family Court
Either parent can apply to the Family Court for a Child Arrangements Order if they are unable to agree on matters between themselves or where there are safeguarding concerns – see our Sheffield Family Court section for more information.
Referral to a family time provider
Family Time providers (also known as Child Contact centres) are there for when trust has broken down, communication is difficult, and a neutral space is needed. Family Time can also take place when there are more complex issues or a child is at risk of harm from a parent. Family Time can take place on an organisations premises or out and about.
Some Family Time providers offer support for re-introductions if a period of time has elapsed, co-parenting programmes, help to complete parenting plans and support and tips to help you talk with your children about what is happening and ensure decisions that affect them are influenced by their wishes and feelings.
Contact them and find out which organisation is best for your needs. You can find NACCC-accredited centres in Sheffield here.
Other useful information
Top Tips for Parents
The FJYPB is the Family Justice Young People’s Board, a group of children and young people who have experienced the Family Court system. They have written a list of top tips for separating parents, which you can download here:
There is also a set of useful Gov.uk guides on children, which you can access via the Advice Now website: www.advicenow.org.uk
Reducing Parental Conflict
The Planning Together for Children programme is a national training course to help separated parents understand and work through their separation in a more positive way. It’s available via a network of local providers. Parents attend the course separately. You can find out more information here.
Sheffield Parenting Hub provides support and courses focusing on reducing parental conflict along with group-based and one-to-one parenting support events.
Buzz- Support for Separated Families provides cooperative parenting support. You can message them directly from the website for more information.
Family Therapy
You may wish to consider Family Therapy.
The British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy is the professional association for members of the counselling professions in the UK. They are a registered charity.
If you would like to find out about counselling, therapy, CBT, or mental health support, then you can search the online directory to search and find a therapist local to you who can support your needs.
In Sheffield, we have The Apple Tree Centre, which provides therapy and wellbeing support for children, young people and families in Sheffield. Find out more on their website: https://appletreecentre.co.uk
